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Gender
• Female
Location
• Somewhereinthemountainsville, USA
Member Since
• 2005-08-16
Occupation
• Life-reconstructer (seriously it's a full time job).
Real Name
• Noway Yourgoing Tofindout

Personal

Achievements
• Too many to count...ha ha. I really haven't done anything special except renting and watching aproximately 200 different series of anime from netflix, and managing to lose 60 pounds without going on a diet.
Anime Fan Since
• About a six and a half years ago.
Favorite Anime
• Lucky Star, Ouran High School Host Club, R.O.D. the original and the "tv", Cowboy Bebop, Haibane Renmei, Kamichu!, Azumanga Daioh, Naruto Shippuden, Slayers, Fruits Basket, Ah! My Goddess, Kanon...too many to type.
Goals
• To have a life that is controlled by me, not the whims of my mystifying illness. To finish my novel. To continue my education. To feel HEALTHY for more than a couple of hours. To build much needed muscles.
Hobbies
• Watching anime, cross-stitching, reading, writing, researching, drawing, playing on my PS2 and my wii, messing around on my computer, thinking of my now deceased cat.
Talents
• Singing, writing, art (this encompasses a fairly large number of odd things), finding weird information on the internet, various crafty skills, jewelry-making or advanced cross-stitchery for example.




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myOtaku.com: frabjousarcher[)


Saturday, December 26, 2009

   Stream of Consciousness
I try to talk only of anime, or anime related things on this site but today I am feeling introspective.

What is it about illness that makes a person suddenly and inexplicably a different creature entirely? If you are unlucky enough to become chronically or terminally ill you will know that life is never again what it once was. I feel as if I have become another species. A species closely related to human, but unable to bridge the gap between myself and that human life. I feel very deeply. I am a very internal being. I love the other people living in my home, but feel very definitely apart from them. For I live a different existence. I do not actually live, but endure and carry on ... existing.

I could, I suppose, expose what exactly I am afflicted with to the unknowing person perusing my small, and very insignificant page. But that would take much too long, and make me more depressed, so I will not.

I will not die from my disease. But neither can I truly live. I simply hope it will one day end. The days, weeks, and years that run together in my mind.

At least I can remember myself as I once was: silly, energetic, intelligent, eager to learn, somewhat talented, partially inhibited, looking forward to spontaneity, delighted with the good I saw in my life and in the world and entertainment I pursued. And I can find relief in the knowledge that I still have my sense of humor and wonder to some extent, though I may be a bit more cynical than I once was--before I was introduced to the world of medical practice. For that is what all doctors do. Practice.

Every person is different so how could anyone be entirely certain that one treatment will work for everyone? It is astounding how much the human race still doesn't know about our own bodies. We like to think that medicine and doctors can fix anything. How terrible is the knowledge that this is nowhere near truth.

I am glad that I began to explore the world of anime while practically chained to my bed a few months after my illness began. My parents do not understand my determined interest in this form of entertainment. I have watched quite a number of anime series and movies by now. I don't tire of watching series after series of anime. Each one is at least slightly different. I wish we had animation like this in America. And I just keep cheerfully adding more anime to my queue on Netfilx.com.

At least I have my anime when I cannot move very far from my bed.

This has been frabjousarhcer[) signing off.
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